The Tale of the Stupid Pirates

  • The tale begins at Galleons Grave with my loyal crew mate @AmyKittee. While planning our days voyage we decided to see how much booty we could gather so we set sail to Sunkern Grove in our trusty ship Betsy. That's where we found our first two chests, one of them appeared to be crying so that one was left on the beach for the next group of stupid pirates to find. While loading our ship we heard the thunderous sound of cannon fire from the other side of the island. They were unrelenting in their quest to destroy us!

    As a peace offering we offered them the strange crying chest and they appeared to accept as we sailed peacefully away. While adjusting our sails and noticed they had strangely disappeared below the waves. To this day we are uncertain if the odd chest had anything to do with this. That will have to be a mystery for another day because for now the voyage continued.

    Our next voyage treasure took us towards the Snake Island (home to the infamous Tartansnake-8 but luckily we did not encounter him). On our approach we spotted sails on the horizon. Another sloop! After much debate we decided to proceed towards snake island regardless. As we got closer the seas suddenly seemed much more crowded with not just one but three sails on the horizon. At this point we decided, like the brave pirates we are, to leave... quickly. As our dreams of booty at Snake Island were dashed we instead headed towards the edge of the charted seas and cast our anchor at Mermaids Hideaway instead. The mermaids were kind to us and offered us many chests.

    As much time had passed we slowly, visiting many islands, made our way back to Snake Island and claimed the promised treasure. It was at this point in our voyage we decided we had no need for such vast piles of gold. We decided at this stage that when our days journey was over we would gift our wealth to a newcomer of the seas. As we had amassed quite a fortune already we headed back to where it all began, Galleons Grave. On the way back we encountered many ships who had been less fortunate than we and had slipped beneath the waves never to be seen again. The final of these was the wreck of the Liars Fortune, close to Sunkern Grove, which yielded our 20th chest.

    Once we arrived back at Galleons Grave we decided to lay our precious cargo our in front of the gold merchant for any pirate to discover as they made their way to or from the in for a bit grog. Once this was all laid out we took a moment to appreciate the days work.

    Unfortunately at this point our trusty companion couldn't take it anymore and she too slipped below the waves right before our eyes.

    We spent some time drinking in the inn to mourn the passing of our beloved Betsy. As we were stumbling out towards the oceans to end our miserable lives (and feed some sharks) a galleon arrived! It quickly became clear it was a new crew that had started where our journey had earlier that same day.

    Upon exiting the inn this new crew seemed confused and rather... excited to find our days booty just waiting for them to hand in. They quickly began to gather the chests and deliver them the 3 meters to the merchant who was waiting to receive them.

    As this was going on we played some shanty's as we cautiously approached. It was at this point they murdered us. Brutally.

    It seemed the voyage of the stupid pirates had come to a close. Perhaps we will sail the seas again and the next pirates who we try to befriend by donating our fortune will be more receptive to our attempts.

    And so ends the Tale of the Stupid Pirates, a good time was had by all.

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  • PS. there were actually 20 chests. Like the stupid pirates we are, we left one behind on Betsy, and took screenshots before she sank. It wasn't until she was down that we noticed the last one floating on the waves.

  • for future reference, I'm pretty sure the 'Chest of Sorrows' is the one that pays the most...would explain their willingness to take it ;)

    also, on a personal note, I love the fact that your chests were arranged by type :D

  • @triheadedmonkey we only didn't want it because we just wanted to see how many chests we could collect and only go to an outpost at the end of the session, we didn't want the hassle of bailing water out every 5 minutes :P

  • This is a great story. I really enjoyed reading it and completing my imagination with some well deserved screenshots you guys took.

    What can we conclude from your story is that it's never about the destination or the loot, it's never about the fame and money gained, but the one thing that binds them all together: The voyage itself. Aye! This is what it means to be a pirate and live to tell the tales. This is: Sea of Thieves

    Thank you Rare for this opportunity and blessing you have offered us and Thank You @SoggyBiscuit204 and @AmyKittee for this amazing story.

    May yer journeys and tales be forever told and never forgotten. Aaaarr!!

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