@iwopo
"Toxic" is an overused buzzword that has lost most, if not all, of it's real meaning much like "snowflake" or "sjw". People throw them around as a cheap shortcut for trying to discredit somebody else.
The most common form of toxicity is taking trash talk too far.
"Oh, it's just words."
Maybe to you, but everybody isn't like you. And no, it isn't about having thick skin. Some people have a harder time dealing with that kind of stuff. I can shrug off pretty much everything thrown at me, but I'm not going to project my own position and temperament on to others.
Good natured trash talk is pretty easy to distinguish from actual hateful talk. If someone rags on me during an attack, I hardly even notice. If they do it when the fighting's all over on the Ferry (calling me the technical word for a female dog), then I'm going to label you a jerk and/or child and just ignore you.
Actions can be more nebulous, especially in a game like SoT. Of course attacking and plundering other ships isn't toxic. Anyone who calls you toxic over that is just upset and reacting out of anger.
My style of play means I don't encounter much contention in the first place, so I can't give you many examples, but I'll list one here.
I once had a brig sail up on me while I was making my way to Twin Groves. It was obvious I wasn't going to escape so, as I often do, I dropped anchor and laid out the Villainous Skull I had at the time on deck. I then sat down on my sloop's canopy and waited.
Now usually the other ship would either open fire immediately to sink me or send someone over to board my ship. Upon boarding they'd usually look at me for a second or two and then steal my loot or, more often, kill me and steal my loot.
And that is all good and part of the game. That time, however, things went a bit different. They shot a couple cannonballs at me and put a hole in my sloop before one of them swam over. He gave me the usual look and then made off with my skull.
"Oh cool," I thought. "Guess they're just after my loot." Feeling the encounter was over, I went down to patch my ship. Upon coming back up, I find the guy's back. Strange, but nothing that hasn't happened before.
I wait to see what he'll do, but he doesn't really do much of anything. Then his crew puts another hole in my ship. Just one, though, as they continuously circle me. This time I let the hole go, figuring they're looking to kill me after all.
But then the guy on my ship goes and fixes it. Then he takes a swipe at me with his sword. I don't react, just eat a banana. The ship fires again, and once more puts a solitary hole in my sloop. This time the guy gives me a single shot with his blunderbus which knocks me overboard.
I wait for a moment to see if he'll give chase, but he doesn't. Obviously they were trying to goad me into a confrontation, so I bailed. I dove deep and swam off toward Twin Groves where I scuttled my ship and continued on with the Tall Tale I was doing.
Now was what this crew did all that terrible? No, not to me. I shrugged it off, found a rowboat on Twin Groves and finished the Tale. But it was over the line on in-game behavior. It was clear that I wasn't interested in a fight, so the clear choices would be to take my stuff and leave or kill me and loot my ship.
They chose, instead, to drag out the encounter in a desperate bid to goad a reaction out of me. And while I can let that stuff slide off my back, others aren't the same and I won't be so dismissive as to suggest they just need to "toughen up".
Now this doesn't excuse people who throw around the word "toxic" willy-nilly. But they don't mean that we can just write off "toxicity" as "not real" either. As always, it's a case by case basis that you need to take the time to fully understand. A bit harder than just dismissing or slapping a buzzword on it, I know; but I think most of us have the mental capacity to at least attempt it.
