Behold slowpokes the Speedboi is here!

  • Greetings and whatnot.
    Now I know what you may be thinking, who are you? I've never heard of you, how dare you call me slow! gosh you're so handsome.
    Well fear not gentlefolk, most of those questions may or may not be answered.
    Why are you slow? It's because I am fast. I can run away from anything faster than you, which pretty much describes my first 24 hours on this game.
    Running away from anyone and everyone. I mean seriously, some of you guys really need a few minutes in chill the duck out corner.
    No-one cares how many pirates you kill or how many ships you sink, we're Pirates, all that matters is how big your hat is and how long you can remain verticle after a barrel of grog.
    But I'm still having fun, scraped together enough doubloons to make my ship red, this is important, for if you see a red blur streaking across the ocean that's probably me running away, and this is the important bit, faster than you.
    I'm serious, I don't need sails, Pah! I'm going to rope a couple of Seahorses to the front and yeehaw this ship into the next century.
    That's how boats work right?

    Anyway nice to meet you all.

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  • @ricewynd so fast can’t even see you! Running away is quite the pirate thing to do, so sorry not. Soon you’ll be fighting with the best of them.

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