Another round ye scurvy dogs!
As well a stool or two
For ye've come to hear me spin a yarn,
improbable? Aye, but true!
A new style of sloop I tried today
the hull paint darkest black.
With pitch Black sails and kraken wheel
we'd go on the attack.
The inky menace figurehead
adorned her fearsome frame.
And ever by my slooping side,
me best and first mate James.
At Golden sands we first arrived,
that Outpost I like best.
When suddenly a ship we spied
hauling in from the West.
No time to get away had we
the Skelly ship was nigh.
Out on the seas we might avoid
but here we'd fight or die!
Our bony foes hurled ballast balls
with little to no avail.
The black spot was too small and quick
and I too fleet with pail.
We fought them hard and fought them well,
though cannonballs were few.
Eventually we'd have to steal
from that very Skelly crew.
So steal we did and down they went
the spoils they did rise.
Some lovely chests of precious gems
and skulls glittered in our eyes.
Now the plan this night was legend bound
and Athena's fortune sought.
To crescent isle we sailed for next,
that's about as far as we got.
Soon after we'd made landfall there
and skeletons engaged.
More sails appeared pointed our way
surely battle was presaged.
We readied guns but rammed we were
and two men hopped aboard.
We took them down quite easily,
and the leaks were not ignored.
Another pass and still yet more
we fired at each other.
These pests we would handle yet,
but the megalodon was another.
The fight went on and bites were had
more holes from teeth than shot.
This hectic battle won't be won
"Unless, maybe..." we thought.
If only they'd hit shadowmaw
and take him off our tail.
Then maybe we'd escape intact
and not our voyage fail.
And sure enough he took a hit
though it was not our ball.
So turned tail back to crescent isle
and hoped they'd lost their gall.
But sadly no they trailed us back
but this time one man spoke.
He claimed they meant us no ill will
and seemed a pleasant bloke.
They'd only come to gather snakes
but feared we'd put up fight.
"Well next time lead with talk" we said,
and things should be alright.
So fine I felt about this truce,
an alliance we did form.
Though it took some time for them to join
much longer than the norm.
I carried on to fight undead,
but me first mate felt unease.
"I'll stay here with the ship" said he.
In case these gents were sleaze.
Slowly then they came around,
and told us they were off.
"Have a good one!" I replied,
My nicety was scoffed.
I dove right back into the fray
once more James stayed on deck.
When sure enough the cannons came
they had us by the neck.
To my great shame I wasn't there
to fight those lying knaves.
I'd once more gotten killed myself
fighting captains in the caves.
In my absence me first mate fought,
and knowing 'twas the end.
The powder keg's short fuse he lit
the ship it's wrath did rend.
Once from the ferry I returned
there were still two of them left.
With eye of reach I made it one
needing punishment for theft.
At sailors bounty James has spawned,
The black spot was renewed.
Our enemies were sailing off,
but with only one man crewed.
For one remained on crescent isle,
fleeing to the sea.
His mermaid he had got to catch,
else he would face me.
But on their way to Golden sands
these knaves they hit a hitch.
For suddenly the azure waves
turned black and dark as pitch.
I cheered from my small vantage point,
still marooned upon the isle.
While first mate James sailed back to me
both giddy with a smile.
We watched with glee while low on shot
they tried to best the beast.
And from the Crow's nest I could see
the krakens tasty feast.
Down they went and in we sailed
to finish off the job.
With ruthless trained efficiency
it's precious loot we robbed.
No chest of legend did we find
for late this all had drawn.
But a grand time we'd both had this night
it had all been quite fun.
So when to the black spot ye sail,
and alliances beseech.
Remember this ballad and heed these words:
Karma is a beach.